Checklist for Chinese dinners.
- Brandy, beer, whiskey and more recently, cheap wine
- Guests who shouts instead of conversing within the tolerable decible range
- Late guests who were supposed to arrive at 1900 but arrives at 2000. This results in the late serving of food that has been prepared since 1830. (Cold lotus leaf rice/roasted pork anyone? Oh, you'll gulp it down anyway cause you were starving!)
- Karaoke sessions by seniors who belts oldies which no one born before 1970's knows of. Plus, their singing encourages people to speak even louder! (refer to previous point)
- Relatives who are more interested in your marriage/relationship with your other half. They will take turns in interrogating your parents and yourself on the person you are dating as if they are going to spend the rest of their lives with your other half. Your life will be even more miserable if you are a female above 25 years old and not seeing anyone at the moment.
- Gossips on relatives who are not seated at your table
- Gossips on relatives who are absent (even if he/she just left for the washroom)
- Self-appointed director for the night. He/she will volunteer themselves to dictate how the toast and cake cutting ceremony should be. How to spot these individuals? They are usually the ones who instruct others on top of their lungs on how the camera angle should be, who should be toasting first, how to cut the cake... etc. Erm... i think you get the picture.
- Purpose of the dinner! Well... erm... not really. Who cares about reason for the dinner? Chinese dinners are avenues for old uncles and aunties to gather and get drunk. Heck, even funeral wakes are avenues for these old folks to gamble and do the things listed here. LoL.